Jokes I Like

[lingo]

A young lady came home from a date looking rather sad. She told her mother, Arthur proposed to me an hour ago.

Then why are you so sad? her mother asked.

Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell.

Her mother replied, Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is.

[جنرال1]

thank u for all u give it us ,,,,,

[jnn]

Somewhat Funny ,,, THANKS

[Meant To be]

It's really funny one
I like it
Thanks lingo for sharing it with us

[lingo]

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bean: 16

Friend: Why?
Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse

[lingo]

True facts about men!
1. If you think the way to a man's heart is through his stomach you're aiming too high.

2. Woman don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

3. The best reason to divorce a man is a health reason:you're sick of him.

4. Never trust a man who says he's the boss at home. He probably lies about other things too.

5. A woman's work that is never done is the stuff she asked her husband to do.

6. If you want a nice man go for a bald one -- they try harder.

7. Go for younger men. You might as well -- they never mature anyway.

8. A man who can dress himself without looking like Wurzel Gummidge is unquestionably gay.

9. Men are all the same -- they just have different faces so you can tell them apart.

10. Definition of a man with manners -- he gets out of the bath to pee.

11. Whenever you meet a man who would make a good husband, you will usually find that he is
married

12. Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of five men -- a woman.

13. There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -strong, caring, loving -- they'd be wrong but you could still use them.

14. Men are like animals -- messy, insensitive and potentially violent -- but they make great pets.

15. Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.

16. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - "don't" and "stop"..

17. Husbands are like children -- they're fine if they're someone else's.

[Try To Reach]

http://www.mahjoob.com/ar/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

loooooooooool
for sure women can do hell
thanx bro

[lingo]

Men's Advice To Women


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it's up, put it down.
3. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
4. Get rid of your cat.
5. Sunday = TV Sports.
6. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
7. You have too many shoes.
8. Crying is blackmail.
9. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
10. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
11. Peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
12. Simple "yes" and "no" are perfectly acceptable answers.
13. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
14. Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
16. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
17. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done -- not both.
18. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
19. You have enough clothes.
20. Men are from earth; women are from earth. Deal with it

[T.Sultan]

Lingo ,

Thank you for the jokes. I like them because most of them have a lot of moral lessons. Please, keep up the good work.

[lingo]

Mulla Nasrudin walked into a restaurant, leaving the door open, whereupon another man boomed, "Shut the door! Were you brought up in a barn?"
The Mulla went back, shut the door, sat down, and began to cry. The other man became uneasy, went over to the Mulla and said, "I am sorry I hurt your feelings."
Mulla Nasrudin said, "YOU DIDN'T HURT MY FEELINGS, BUT IT MAKES ME HOMESICK EVERY TIME I HEAR A JACKASS BRAY."

[Try To Reach]

http://www.mahjoob.com/ar/forums/images/smilies/do7ok.gif


loooooooooool
thats really funny mullah
i have similar one here
have a look


Two people, John and Mike, are sitting on a plane behind a Pakistani guy.
To irritate the Pakistani guy they strike up this conversation
John says to Mike
So where are you off to.....India
Mike: "Oh, no I heard that there are too many Muslims there."
(The Pakistani guy stirs in his seat)
John: "Are you going to Iran
Mike: "No, that place is even more populated with Muslims!"
John: "Are you going to Indonesia
Mike: "Ugh....no way....that place is crawling with Muslims!
(By now the Pakistani guy is getting really mad
John: "So, you must be going to Pakistan
Mike: "Absolutely NOT.....that place is INFESTED with Muslims!!"
Frustrated, the Pakistani Guy turns around and says:
"WHY DON'T YOU BOTH GO TO HELL, I HEAR THERE AREN'T ANY MUSLIMS !!!"

http://www.mahjoob.com/ar/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

[lingo]

Mulla Nasrudin was round at his fiancee's home, having a serious talk with her father.
"Sir, I'd like to marry your daughter," he announced .
His girl's father looked at him.
"Have you seen my wife yet?" he asked.
"OH, YES SIR," replied Nasrudin. "BUT IF YOU DON'T MIND, I WOULD STILL PREFER YOUR DAUGHTER, SIR."

[حايلي]

:36_16_2: nice joke