قصيدة من تأليفي أرجو التعليق

[FUTUREDREAM]

The Lost Dream

I find happiness in loneliness
Listen to me please don't be careless
Sometimes you are happy in being alone
And think that you have a throne

I feel my life will destroy
And I always try to be strong
"Oh God be with me " I say
"Help me to strive and to stay"
Life needs you to be pleasant
Also try to be efficient

Yeah I've talents and great ambition
But these are not the others' mission
Especially those around me
They always try to ignore me
I say to myself cheer up
And always try to stand up
This life is just a road
Not a dream to travel abroad
Sometimes I have a strong desire
To be quick in my study like a fire

I dreamt so much to be a boy
Not a girl playing with a toy
To get whatever I want
Without hearing the word "don't"
To continue in my advanced study
For this way, I'll be happy
Not to wait for love
But to search for it like a dove
Cause the moments of waiting are too hard
Unlike searching with all your heart

futuredream,,

[English Lover]

It' a wonderful


great ,



and amazing poem


but so sad and a little black


I hope you get the wanted dreams



Thank you so much for sharing us your creative poetic

[ريما الحسين]

wooooooow :smile (40)::smile (40): how a great poem

thanks my brother it's so nice

[FUTUREDREAM]

thanks alot your opinions

[vanish]

حلم المستقبل
قصيدتك جميلة جدا بشكل عام وتدل على قدرات شعرية ولغوية هائلة
لكن انت طلبت منا التعليق وانت لم تطلب التعليق منا الا انك تريد الحقيقة بدون مجاملة حتى تعرف انطباعنا الحقيقي لتقيم انت قصيدتك بناء على ردة فعلنا فاذا اكتفينا بالتصفيق والمدح اصبحنا نخدعك ولم نوفي طلبك لكن انا سوف اقدم ملاحظاتي على القصيدة مع انها سهلة جدا وقد اكون انا مخالف الصواب يعني نقدي ليس شرطا ان يكون صائب كما ان ملاحظاتي لاتعني انها عيوب في القصيدة.



The Lost Dream

I find happiness in loneliness
Listen to me please don't be careless
Sometimes you are happy in being alone
And think that you have a throne
الاستانزا الأول في نظري اجمل المقاطع من حيث المعنى

I feel my life will destroy
And I always try to be strong
"Oh God be with me " I say
"Help me to strive and to stay"
Life needs you to be pleasant
Also try to be efficient
المقطع الثاني ياليت تبين ما المقصود من السطر الاول الذي تقول فيه( لايف ول دستروي)
Yeah I've talents and great ambition
But these are not the others' mission
Especially those around me
They always try to ignore me
I say to myself cheer up
And always try to stand up
This life is just a road
Not a dream to travel abroad
Sometimes I have a strong desire
To be quick in my study like a fire
ايضا المقطع الثالث جميل جدا ماعدا الشطر الاخيرالذي تقول فيه(توبي لايك ا فاير) يعني لو استبدلته بافضل منه
I dreamt so much to be a boy
Not a girl playing with a toy
To get whatever I want
Without hearing the word "don't"
To continue in my advanced study
For this way, I'll be happy
Not to wait for love
But to search for it like a dove
Cause the moments of waiting are too hard
Unlike searching with all your heart

هذا ما لدي
مشكور على القصيدة الجميلة جداجدا

[FUTUREDREAM]

شكرا كثير على التعليق يا vanish
وقصدي من السطر الأول في المقطع الثاني إن حياتي بتحطم من الي ألاقيه
والمقطع الثالث قصدت إني أبغى أكون سريع في الدراسة وتكملة دراستي زي سرعة النار لما تنتشر في مكان بس عشان السجع
وأشكرك مره ثانيه على مرورك وتعليقك
وكل الي قالو آرائهم

[البـارع]

Thanks dear

i enjoyed reading these sweet lines

keep it up

.
.



Cause the moments of waiting are too hard


that's the problem of all

[postgraduate]

Ohhhhhhh what a beautiful poem !!!!! I really love it ....thanx very much

[postgraduate]

Here is an other one but it is not me who wrote it .It is for A.E Houseman. it is entitled with (The Immortal Part )I hope that you will enjoy reading it


tHE FIRST TWO STANZAS ARE
When I meet the morning beam
Or lay me down at night to dream
I hear my bones within me say
An other night an other day

When shall this slough of sense be cast
This dust of thoughts be laid at last
The man of flesh and soul be slain
And the man of bones remain


HOPE MUCH MORE FUN FOR ALLL OF YOU

[ash1405]

in fact i have been reading english since five years but like this poed i have not please keep up but it will be better if it talks about the white side
thank you
abadi

[FUTUREDREAM]

thank you dear members of saudienglish you really encourage me to write more and more poems
so thanks alot