BloumagrieT
27-11-2008, 03:09 PM
http://www.saudienglish.net/vb/attachment.php?attachmentid=16172&stc=1&d=1227784536
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SeLf-EsTeAm
:smile (58):
At first , let's define this word ..
Dr. Nathaniel Branden
], the father of the concept of
self-esteem, has an expanded two-fold definition.
And I can't think of a better one.
He defines self-esteem as:
1- Confidence in our ability to think and in our ability to cope with the basic challenges of life; and
2- Confidence in our right to be successful and happy, the feelings of being worthy, deserving, entitled to
assert our needs and wants, achieve our values and enjoy the fruits of our efforts.
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/
Our self-concept affects practically every single thing about each one of us from
the time we're small children till the day we die.
When we have long-term problems in our careers,
our physical and mental health and in our relationships,
it is most always due to the quality of our decisions and actions,
which can practically always be traced back to our self-esteem.
Conversely, our achievements in all areas of our lives can also be traced back to
how we see ourselves.
/
\
/
Practice makes perfect
So , one can practice self-esteam to gain the following:
Forgive yourself for whatever crap you've done or imagined you've done
Forgive others who've done all kinds of rotten things to you
Let go of:
Addictive pleasure seeking (at all costs) thoughts & behaviors
Arrogance and conceit
Jealousy
Harmful anger
Blaming other people or situations for your problems
Pettiness
Selfishness
Laziness
Prejudice
Dishonesty (lying, cheating, stealing)
Fear of rejection...
Negative reactions to/fear of criticism/necessary feedback
And many, many other programmed thoughts and behaviors that don't support you in leading a happy,
productive life.
/
\
/
Try to build up your self-esteam
and you'll build also:
Character
- honesty, integrity, genuineness (you walk your talk),
strength in your decision making, honor, living by an upright set of principles
When you own these inner characteristics on all levels,
you and everyone around you will know it, absolutely.
Optimism
- You'll live as if each day is a gift, your mind will open to benefits of achievement,
you'll believe that things will work out.
Accomplishment orientation
- You'll be coached that you are now a conscientious, hard worker,
that you do your share, and take care to do things right,
that you seek out and take advantage of available opportunities.
The more things that you are good at and the more challenging goals you reach,
the more opportunities you have to feel good about yourself.
Joy
- You'll feel a deep sense of peace in doing your best in all situations,
that your successes motivate you to keep going,
that you are comfortable with being recognized for what you achieve in life.
You'll be immersed in the beliefs that you are happy to be alive,
that you live with enthusiasm, that you are adventurous.
Mistakes, setbacks, challenges and "problems"
- Yours won't phase you, you shrink them down,
learn every shred you can from each one and go forward
undeterred even more determined and more skillful than before;
you don't judge yourself by impossible standards,
you just do your best, and happily live as an imperfect being.
You'll be getting programmed to instinctively see problems and challenges
as opportunities to learn, grow and get ahead,
and that no matter how hopeless others may feel, you stay optimistic.
Friendships/relationships
- You support other people, you feel comfortable with all kinds of people,
you spend time with wonderful, loving, supportive, kind, happy, intelligent people.
Your brain will be directed to believe that you are worthy
of having great relationships with terrific people, that you are a valuable friend to others,
that anyone would be lucky to have a friend like you, that people like you instantly,
that you love people and that showing affection is easy for you
Side note: Have you ever noticed that when you smile at someone,
they usually smile back? Well, when you treat people the way they want to be treated,
they'll reciprocate, and guess what? Right! You'll feel tremendous about yourself,
and on a grander scale, tremendous about living.
Discipline
- Your mind will be drenched with thoughts that you are determined
to reach your strongest desires, patient when you need to be,
self-motivated and strong-willed.
Leadership
- You have leadership qualities and skills, you exercise whatever authority you have effectively,
fairly and with respect for others and you are organized and worthy of being followed.
Hey, if you have authority/control over anyone else,
it's critical that you see yourself as a good and effective leader...
because if you don't, no one else will either.
Learning
- Life doesn't stand still. So you'll be liberally peppered with thoughts that
you love to learn... constantly. You are always trying to figure things out,
testing your memory, developing your mind and skills so that you will always be
highly valued no matter what stage of your life you are in.
Time
- Time is our most precious asset. But almost everyone tries to "kill" or "waste" it.
The people we studied who value themselves the most,
make their time worth a lot. This doesn't mean that you can never sit still...
it means those with high self-esteem use their time to do what they love to do
when not at work or filling some other duty.
In addition, high self-esteem individuals tend to enjoy their routine tasks
more than anyone else. They just have a way of putting a positive value
on most everything.
"copied with little editing "
/
\
/
^.^
/
\
/
SeLf-EsTeAm
:smile (58):
At first , let's define this word ..
Dr. Nathaniel Branden
], the father of the concept of
self-esteem, has an expanded two-fold definition.
And I can't think of a better one.
He defines self-esteem as:
1- Confidence in our ability to think and in our ability to cope with the basic challenges of life; and
2- Confidence in our right to be successful and happy, the feelings of being worthy, deserving, entitled to
assert our needs and wants, achieve our values and enjoy the fruits of our efforts.
/
\
/
Our self-concept affects practically every single thing about each one of us from
the time we're small children till the day we die.
When we have long-term problems in our careers,
our physical and mental health and in our relationships,
it is most always due to the quality of our decisions and actions,
which can practically always be traced back to our self-esteem.
Conversely, our achievements in all areas of our lives can also be traced back to
how we see ourselves.
/
\
/
Practice makes perfect
So , one can practice self-esteam to gain the following:
Forgive yourself for whatever crap you've done or imagined you've done
Forgive others who've done all kinds of rotten things to you
Let go of:
Addictive pleasure seeking (at all costs) thoughts & behaviors
Arrogance and conceit
Jealousy
Harmful anger
Blaming other people or situations for your problems
Pettiness
Selfishness
Laziness
Prejudice
Dishonesty (lying, cheating, stealing)
Fear of rejection...
Negative reactions to/fear of criticism/necessary feedback
And many, many other programmed thoughts and behaviors that don't support you in leading a happy,
productive life.
/
\
/
Try to build up your self-esteam
and you'll build also:
Character
- honesty, integrity, genuineness (you walk your talk),
strength in your decision making, honor, living by an upright set of principles
When you own these inner characteristics on all levels,
you and everyone around you will know it, absolutely.
Optimism
- You'll live as if each day is a gift, your mind will open to benefits of achievement,
you'll believe that things will work out.
Accomplishment orientation
- You'll be coached that you are now a conscientious, hard worker,
that you do your share, and take care to do things right,
that you seek out and take advantage of available opportunities.
The more things that you are good at and the more challenging goals you reach,
the more opportunities you have to feel good about yourself.
Joy
- You'll feel a deep sense of peace in doing your best in all situations,
that your successes motivate you to keep going,
that you are comfortable with being recognized for what you achieve in life.
You'll be immersed in the beliefs that you are happy to be alive,
that you live with enthusiasm, that you are adventurous.
Mistakes, setbacks, challenges and "problems"
- Yours won't phase you, you shrink them down,
learn every shred you can from each one and go forward
undeterred even more determined and more skillful than before;
you don't judge yourself by impossible standards,
you just do your best, and happily live as an imperfect being.
You'll be getting programmed to instinctively see problems and challenges
as opportunities to learn, grow and get ahead,
and that no matter how hopeless others may feel, you stay optimistic.
Friendships/relationships
- You support other people, you feel comfortable with all kinds of people,
you spend time with wonderful, loving, supportive, kind, happy, intelligent people.
Your brain will be directed to believe that you are worthy
of having great relationships with terrific people, that you are a valuable friend to others,
that anyone would be lucky to have a friend like you, that people like you instantly,
that you love people and that showing affection is easy for you
Side note: Have you ever noticed that when you smile at someone,
they usually smile back? Well, when you treat people the way they want to be treated,
they'll reciprocate, and guess what? Right! You'll feel tremendous about yourself,
and on a grander scale, tremendous about living.
Discipline
- Your mind will be drenched with thoughts that you are determined
to reach your strongest desires, patient when you need to be,
self-motivated and strong-willed.
Leadership
- You have leadership qualities and skills, you exercise whatever authority you have effectively,
fairly and with respect for others and you are organized and worthy of being followed.
Hey, if you have authority/control over anyone else,
it's critical that you see yourself as a good and effective leader...
because if you don't, no one else will either.
Learning
- Life doesn't stand still. So you'll be liberally peppered with thoughts that
you love to learn... constantly. You are always trying to figure things out,
testing your memory, developing your mind and skills so that you will always be
highly valued no matter what stage of your life you are in.
Time
- Time is our most precious asset. But almost everyone tries to "kill" or "waste" it.
The people we studied who value themselves the most,
make their time worth a lot. This doesn't mean that you can never sit still...
it means those with high self-esteem use their time to do what they love to do
when not at work or filling some other duty.
In addition, high self-esteem individuals tend to enjoy their routine tasks
more than anyone else. They just have a way of putting a positive value
on most everything.
"copied with little editing "
/
\
/
^.^