Finding Your Strength in Difficult Times

**nosa** · 14-07-2005, 05:50 AM

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Everyone is looking for happiness. But happiness is not a goal. It is a result of doing what you like and relating honestly to other people

Happiness is about being your own person, making your own decisions, doing what you want because you want to do it, and living your own life to please yourself. It's about being independent, allowing others to be free, and seeking the best in yourself and in the world

It's so easy to do the opposite _ to cling to others expecting to be taken care of, to control people and blame them when things go wrong, to be in sincere and play at relationships and careers rather than commit, to tease rather than respond, and to live on the fringe of others lives rather than in the middle of your own

When you do not live your own life as your own person, you live an unhappy life indeed. You have the sense that your life is going no where, that life has little meaning, and the meaning it does have loses it substance when you examine it closely

Your life is supposed to be for yourself

Your life is given to you to create its meaning. You have no one to blame if your life does not turn out the way you wanted it to be. No one owes you anything. You are the only person who can make a lasting difference. A little boost of support here or there means nothing unless you have committed to go all the way yourself, no matter what happens

No promises that anyone ever made to you have the power to make a lasting difference

No betrayal or abandonment has the power to limit your growth or blunt your success unless you need an excuse for failing that badly

Putting it bluntly, you have the ability to get over just about everything. And if you intend to be happy during this life you are going to have to get over a lot all the time

The first thing you have to get over is the belief that someone is coming in your life to make all the difference

Don't count on anyone coming to rescue you, give you the big break, defeat your enemies, stand up for you, recognize your worth, and open doors

Either you are the savior in your own life or your life without redemption

You deserve to be happy, but you also deserve everything that you accept. So look at
your unhappiness. It is a record of your failure to be your own person

Your unhappiness is really nothing more than a reminder that you have some work to do to be happy again
Because being happy is liking the way you feel; if you are unhappy it means that you don't like the way you feel

You are the person who is supposed to do something about that

Being happy requires that you take subtle but important risks all the time

You need to assert yourself. Avoid manipulation, pointless arguments, and confrontations

You need to tell the truth and correct your lies

You need to stop playing the victim so you can enjoy your success with out feeling guilty

To find happiness you need to be your own person, not a pretender

You need to let go of your expectations of what you think life should be like so that you don't unrealistically judge others and find them lacking and ungiving

You need to give up living in the past

You need to learn to forgive and to let go in order to move on

You need to learn to listen in order to bring out the best in others

You need to take yourself seriously, but not so seriously that you have to be perfect all the time or can not admit your errors or weaknesses

You need to understand that you are always growing. So you must continually be aware of the compromises that inhibit your growth and the relationships where you feel you give away too much

You need a purpose in life

You need to work at the purpose and create the life you want, not live in empty hope of deliverance

Being happy takes work, the work of life. Since you are going to live your own life, you might as well live it as your best

Each of my later topics that will follow this one will addresses one particular issue on the road to becoming your own person and finding happiness. It is all straightforward advice and has common sense and directness to recommend it. Most of it you already know. It is presented in this fashion to inspire you to accept yourself so that you can find and give your gift

This is a concentrated topic of knowledge, and many important meanings may slip by you on first reading. Whether you read one paragraph a day or read this entire topic in one sitting, each paragraph deserves reading

You will discover that the way you see the individual sections will change as you grow or when your situation changes

Sometimes it takes a crisis to open you up to a new understanding or allow you to incorporate this advice into your life. Going back over a section in a time of difficulty will open you up to new ideas that you may have missed before

I urge you to take all of this to heart. I have assembled it form a life-time of working with people. I have written it so that it cuts through to the center of each issue and speaks directly to your heart

Being happy is understanding and accepting yourself as you are right now.
That is the only true freedom
This, the only time to achieve it
You, the only person who can do it

**Jamal** · 14-07-2005, 06:57 AM

Thanks for this excellent topic.

**wisam0** · 14-07-2005, 09:02 AM

nosa

Being happy is understanding and accepting yourself as you are right now.

very good and meaningful words

thanks

sis

**Instigator** · 14-07-2005, 09:34 AM

,nosa
it is my pleasure to see you posting
.such wonderful thread about happiness

Thanks for these meaningful words

**(ASTRO)** · 14-07-2005, 05:01 PM

Wise words indeed !! Yes, I agree totally with the writer that we should start bearing the responsbilies we owe to ourselves and to those who rely on us. Nonetheless, I hate to say that in order to evoke this feeling in the mind of the reader, the writer seems to push the reader into thinking that he or she is really alone in this world and should not expect anything from anyone. That to me can lead eventually to despair and mistrust.

I applaud you Umm Muhammed for raising such an issue.

**enigma** · 16-07-2005, 04:16 PM

[align=left]Dear nosa,thanks for this brilliant topic[align=left][/center]
I think we all should dig out our buried treasures, never let our talents just die inside us

we must give them a chance to meet the test of life.We should never ever underestimate

ourselves & think that we're incapable of doing certain things cause our abilities have no

limitations.But we have to bear in mind that no one is perfect & never try to be someone

else cause in acting out a part we may end up losing track of who we are.We must raise

the ceiling so that we can rise to the heights,but keep a floor below us so we don't fall

too far

[align=left]I beleive I can fly........ I can touch the sky[/center][/center]

**درة المشـــاعر** · 18-07-2005, 07:51 AM

Darling

Really, I don't know what shall I write . I admire each and every letters you have written. Your words diminish alot of our pains which are created by this rough world and give us a great hope.
In fact they are woooooooooonderful and I like this topic sooo much
With all my regard
your sister

**زهرة وفى** · 25-07-2005, 10:22 PM

thanks darling your topic
i wish you happiness in your life

**nosa** · 31-07-2005, 01:35 PM

jamal
Wisam0
Instigator
ASTRO
enigma
my lovely sisterدرة مشاعر
وزهرة وفى

as we see, This is life We all should
expect everything in this life
If it's good or bad

I really Appreciate your passing
Thanx for your words

God bless the all